The Resolution Making Process Leave a comment

Making selections is rarely straightforward and the worst thing is we are never taught how you can make decisions. No one taught us this life skill as we’re growing up. Nobody in school or at dwelling taught us. We only learn by observation. And most of the time we observe people not knowing find out how to make a decision!

And probably the most ineffective processes is within the making of a pros and cons list! And this is without doubt one of the most popular ways in which folks base their decisions on.

So the commonest query I get from my students and clients is this: Do I make my decision based mostly on logic or based mostly on what my coronary heart tells me? Ah, this is where we journey ourselves up BIG TIME. We frequently see logic and our emotions as two separate entities, because now we have not experienced them enough to be one unit. And now we have not understood ourselves sufficient to know that they are interconnected.

Now let’s play satan’s advocate here: what is logic? The definition of logic is appropriate reasoning. But correct reasoning is not the last word truth. Our reasoning relies on data we now have in the mean time, and so logic expands or contracts relying on available data/information. This additionally signifies that logic can change or evolve as we evolve. When we talk about logic, we appear to have a fixed idea that logic does not change. However when we talk about emotions/emotions, we have no qualms about accepting that yes, our emotions/emotions do change relying on situations/circumstances.

If both logic and our feelings do evolve/remodel, this implies that our determination-making process is actually much simpler than we think. Why? We now have a higher tolerance for things to alter, and that even if we make a decision now primarily based on what we know, that decision has room to evolve as well because we’re open to the concept we will have more information over time.

Ultimately, this implies that we can only make decisions based mostly on the present moment. I know this sounds kinda zen. However this is the only way we are able to move. We can not live our lives stuck in the past based mostly on past information, neither can we wait in anticipation of what is to return, and be in paralysis, not knowing how one can make the decision. So we will only make choices primarily based on the current moment. Does this make sense to you?

The problem with us people is that we are so filled with fears that confront us in our conscious and unconscious that it is nearly not possible for most people to make selections primarily based on the current moment. Most people can not live like this. They need ensures in life, they need guarantees in success, they concern to be in pain, to be hurt. And so they just want to management everything occurring of their lives, which we know is impossible.

Trying to regulate everything and wanting guarantees will not be living, and it comes from a particularly selfish perspective that you simply actually think you may have any form of management in any way, which stems from a narcissistic egomaniac mind! Can you imagine that almost all of humanity working this way?

In the end, what occurs is that people start making choices primarily based on their fears. “Never trust your fears, they don’t know your strengths” this is such an ideal quote! Our fears are quick-sighted and usually don’t have any depth in perspective, and making our choices primarily based on fears limits us, and prevents us from seeing more and additional, and it actually keeps us in the loop of our comfort zone. We really feel a temporary sense of freedom, thinking we’ve got made the decision that serves us, but whatever decisions we have now made that stems from fear will come back to hang-out us, it is only a matter of time.

As zen as it could sound, the simplest decision-making process is still one that is based mostly on the present second, that feeds into our empowered state, and provides us a way of freedom to understand that: hey! I’m always free to change my perspective about things, people, situations and that I am allowed to evolve.

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